Neverland

 This afternoon I was helping my younger brother clean up and tidy our woods garden, aka the large open space in our woods that butts right up against our yard...don't ask me why it's called garden...nothing grows in there- hence the large open space!

There is a large tree house right in the middle of it with a collection of old broken toys and furniture that has all been used for a multitude of things; pirate ship, house, farm, hospital, etc! Things, meaning toys and furniture, had gotten a little out of hand recently, and since my graduation party is this weekend, I decided that the stuff must get cleaned up!

Now, I'm 17 years old and have not played out there for several years.

As we were cleaning things up I would pick up an old toy and old memories would flood into my mind. I remembered the carefree, and somewhat child I was, up in that tree house being whoever I wanted to be!

I stood there for a moment letting the sweet memories sweep over me.

I suddenly felt a longing to be 10 again pretending to be a nurse. Not having to think about the grades or long years of studying it would take for me to become one!

I wanted to be young, innocent, and without all the stress that life has bogged me down with.  I don't want to have to worry about school, grades, money, relationships, time, etc!

Why, oh why did I wish those years away to get to where I am now? There is nothing glorious about it!

And then I realized...I didn't wish those years away...it happened naturally and over time. I was bound to turn 17-18 eventually! And I had a fun childhood! I wouldn't really change it at all!

And being a teenager has many blessings that as a child, I didn't have!

Like having more freedom, being able to drive ( that's a big one!), having more responsibility, having more say over your life, making decisions YOU want to make, being old enough to be in relationships, and so many more things!

So, I guess my main point in this is...be content in the stage of life you are in! They all have their pro's and con's! It's just what you choose to focus on! 

Well that's it folks!! I'm working on a big post right now...I've been struggling with it, but hope to have it out soon! 

Love, 

Cait

Finding the Light in Singleness

 I don’t really feel adequate writing on this topic, but it is something that I struggled, and still struggle with! I’m not a 26 year old where this is something that actually is a big issue, but I think I still have about the same thought process!

I cringe at the word singleness! Ugg, that word! Just, uggg! Okay I'm done! When I think of the word single I think of an old maid…. someone I would rather not be! No offense my old maid friends!

 I don't know about you (you meaning my single friends!), but I want to settle down and get married (when I’m old enough obviously!) I have had that dream for as long as I can remember! I have my wedding planned out, kid's names picked, dream home decorated…..etc!

Getting married and having that strong handsome prince charming is something that our society has…hmmm, exalted. Think of all those Disney princess movies that we girls (and guys…I’m talking to you too!!)  watched and re-watched when we were little! (*confession* I still watch them!)  

Hollywood has drilled the fact that in order to be happy or have a Happy Ever After… we must have a boyfriend or girlfriend! I hate to break it to you my friends, but though I have never had a boyfriend I can tell you that they can’t make you completely happy! They will let you down; break your heart, and a lot of other stuff! There is only one who can truly satisfy that craving for love and that is our Beloved Creator, Redeemer, Jesus Christ!

I digress…

I have struggled in the past with feelings of discontent because many of my friends around me were getting ‘asked out’, or dating, and none of that had ever happened to me! That really bothered me! It bothered me so much that it consumed me!

  

I felt sad and gave up hope that I would ever get married and be able to use those names for my kids, or decorate my dream house!

A little extreme and ridiculous? Yeah I would agree!

Those feelings were of someone who had not yet been satisfied in the point of life that God had put them in! Yeah that was me!

I can't remember the point in where God actually showed me this... whether it was book I read, a blog post, or a conversation with someone. But that is beside the point! The point is, God worked in that moment. He basically told me that I wasn’t letting Him be enough. I didn't trust Him! I was trying to take matters into my own hands and making a mess of my own heart in the process! (Now I know why we aren't center of our universe...because we really screw this thing up!)

It is super hard! I'm not denying that! Trust me I struggle with this every single day! So don't think for a minute that I am saying this is a piece of cake!

When I started to view my current singleness as a blessing, I began to think...Wow, this whole singleness thing is actually pretty cool!!! I can focus on the passions and gifts that God has given to me, I can be open to how God wants me to further his kingdom, and say yes to the opportunities that may arise out of the blue!

My friends...being married is a beautiful thing (at least I'm assuming it is! I'm not really knowledgeable in that department), but God created singleness too! He gave us a time to do everything that we want to do (those things we want to do should be what God wants us to do....just saying!) before we are having to provide for and take care of a family!

These single years are an amazing blessing my friends!!!!!

Love,

~Cait